During my past month (has it only been a month?) at Brigham Young University, I have discovered the key to finding a quality person. Well, at least, a quality guy.
Just abide by these rules:
Just abide by these rules:
1. Never go out with a guy who wears skinnier or tighter pants than you.
Also avoid those who wear tight v-neck shirts, cardigans, and brightly colored pants/shorts.
2. Stay away from men with mustaches.
Chances are if they have a mustache, they are bound to be sketchy.
Examples of sketchy people who have mustaches:
2. Stay away from men with mustaches.
Chances are if they have a mustache, they are bound to be sketchy.
Examples of sketchy people who have mustaches:
- Carnival workers
- Inmates
- Captain Hook
3. Guys who are only ever wearing basketball shorts (or sweats when it gets cold) and a t-shirt are lazy more often than not...Or on the basketball team...Ask them if they're on the basketball team, if not, don't date them.
4. If he looks like he doesn't have any money, it's probably true. But if he looks like he has money, he probably has less and spends his money frivolously. (He probably spent all his money on his wardrobe of skinny jeans).
5. If Miley Cyrus or Kelly Clarkson is his ringtone...you can't help him.
6. Don't go out with guys who wear their dance pants and shoes to the ward dance.
7. I would advise you to stay away from those who twirl ribbons on the lawn...or anywhere else for that matter.
8. If the ring he wears is the size of a normal human eye, he either:
a) Won a state championship and still can't get over it.
b) Is in the mafia.
c) Both a and b.
9. There is never a good excuse to wear socks with sandals.
10. And most importantly, never ever ever go out with a guy with a mullet or a mohawk. And definitely don't go out with a guy who has a mullet and a mohawk, aka the mullhawk.
Well, I'm off to class.
You can be sure I'll be on the lookout for a guy with a mustache, skinny jeans, dance shoes, and a Miley Cyrus ringtone.
4. If he looks like he doesn't have any money, it's probably true. But if he looks like he has money, he probably has less and spends his money frivolously. (He probably spent all his money on his wardrobe of skinny jeans).
5. If Miley Cyrus or Kelly Clarkson is his ringtone...you can't help him.
6. Don't go out with guys who wear their dance pants and shoes to the ward dance.
7. I would advise you to stay away from those who twirl ribbons on the lawn...or anywhere else for that matter.
8. If the ring he wears is the size of a normal human eye, he either:
a) Won a state championship and still can't get over it.
b) Is in the mafia.
c) Both a and b.
9. There is never a good excuse to wear socks with sandals.
10. And most importantly, never ever ever go out with a guy with a mullet or a mohawk. And definitely don't go out with a guy who has a mullet and a mohawk, aka the mullhawk.
Well, I'm off to class.
You can be sure I'll be on the lookout for a guy with a mustache, skinny jeans, dance shoes, and a Miley Cyrus ringtone.
Look at all this wisdom you've gained in one short month! You could do an infomercial. ;) "All this and more could be yours for the price of being a single girl at BYU!"
ReplyDeleteThe mustache part made me laugh. :)
Come on! Captain Hook happens to be a very handsome man! HAHA Unless of course he is wearing skinny jeans, then steer clear! HAHA
ReplyDeleteBwhahahaha! This made me laugh so hard!
ReplyDeleteLuke had a mullhawk............ its pretty gross.
ReplyDelete(I am not anonymous. Just JD Borg)
Ha ha haaaaaaa!!!
ReplyDeleteHahaha, I definitely laughed out loud reading this. I love the part about the giant ring meaning state champions! I know so many people like that, it's so annoying! I'll be taking your words of wisdom with me when I go to college next year, count on that! :)
ReplyDelete