The Greatest Fear

Believe it or not, marriage has been the number one topic in my thoughts and conversations as of late. Everyone wants to talk about it, and everyone wants to remind me that my days of single-life are coming quickly to an end. (No, I'm not engaged, nor am I dating anyone). Imagine continually thinking about your greatest fear, whether it be spiders, heights, creepy men with shaggy beards, etc., all because people want to keep talking about it. That is me and marriage. I know my mom is sighing and shaking her head already at this post. Sorry Mom, I can't help it. I would go into the details of what exactly about marriage frightens me, but that would be a much longer post than is necessary. We'll save that for another day. I'm sure the topic will come up again.

But just like any girl, I've been planning my wedding since I found out about marriage. I might even look at dresses and rings every once in a while. I was looking at rings the other day in fact when a guy friend texted me and asked what I was up to, so I told him I was bored at work so I was looking at rings.

He said, "Well as nervous as you are about marriage, it's interesting that you browse through the most recognizable symbols of the very thing you fear."

To which I replied, "Blah, blah, blah." (My response to most things nowadays.)

So, yes, I do look at dresses and rings and dream about which temple I'm going to get married in, and what my dress will look like, and if I'll have a beautiful ring. I'm a girl, and I can't help it. Oh, and I might think about who I'll marry occasionally, but only occasionally.

So here are some of the things I've fallen in love with recently:

#1: Monique Lhullier

Okay, so I know these dresses aren't completely modest, but I hate dresses like this http://www.beautifullymodest.com/ Yes, I hate all of them. They all look the same. Sure they may throw in the occasional pleat here and there, but they're basically the same. Anywho, this dress is just classy, and I love everything about it. There would be sleeves of course and the sheer fabric on the top wouldn't be sheer, but you get the picture. (No pun intended).

#2: Alita Graham

I have always LOVED this dress! I think the only thing that would make this dress better--besides a higher neck and sleeves of course--would be pockets. Who wouldn't want a dress with pockets? You could keep all sorts of things in there!

#3: Monique Lhullier

Oh Monique Lhullier, you win the prize for creating the most modest dress by far! (Exeunt cleavage.) The only thing I don't like is the crazy fold on the bottom, but an overall A+ for sure.

#4: Le Spose di Gio

And this one is my favorite. Outstanding!

My mom likes to tell me that when I feel like I'm not ready for something, that's probably when I'm ready for it. I didn't think I was ready for middle school, high school, or college, but it happened anyway and I was ready. So when the time comes for me to get married, hopefully I'll be ready even though I don't think I'll ever feel ready.

Who knows, maybe it won't be so bad.

A Hoard of Compliments

I graduated from EA! Yay! Boo! (Both happy and sad). It's been so great being here, and I have loved every minute of it (not every minute of physics though). During these two years I've met some pretty awesome people, and they are just the salt of the earth. Enough said.

During this past semester though, I have received a large number of great compliments. The people at EA are just so great. I will recap three of my favorites:

Compliment #1: It was the beginning of the "short season"--the season in which everyone wears shorts--and I had just donned my favorite pair of denim shorts and my plaid flippy floppies. I was walking down the sidewalk with some friends enjoying the wonderful sunshine when we began discussing our shorts and the splendid weather, when my friend (who happens to be part Hawaiian, Italian, Native American, etc.) glanced and my bare legs and exclaimed, "Holy cow Kelly! You need to tan!" I can't help that my legs are very nearly see through. Thank you very much.

Compliment #2: I was in the cafeteria eating dinner with Lora and two other great girls. We were sharing our plans for the future, and one of said girls started to tease me about going to the Y just to get married. (A continuing joke I am not fond of at all). She continued with, "But you already have the perfect mom hair do!" No comment.

Compliment #3: I was standing around talking with a group of girls after our last day of choir and certain sentiments of how much we were going to miss each other were exchanged. As I was about to leave, one of the girls who happens to be in my ward gave me a hug. "Kelly, you've really done such a great job in the Relief Society presidency this year," she told me, "and you've really just stood out. Your clothes never really matched, but you've done so well!" What do you mean they don't match?

Bridal Showers

I didn't used to hate bridal showers. In fact I'm sure I used to thoroughly enjoy them. I was full of young, girlish sentiments and relished in the thought of having my own one day, I would get new dishes, pizza pans, and wait....frilly underwear? No, no, I'll just take the pizza pans thanks. Apparently, the concept of bridal showers has completely changed since my St. Johns days. Nobody gives pizza pans anymore. What the?

In the last month I have been invited to and attended six bridal showers. Six. I think that is more bridal showers in one month than I have been to in my twenty (nearly) years of life. These bridal showers have been a major shock to my fragile nerves. "Such spasms and flutterings!" Six days of torture in one month. I would rather sit through physics. Several times. I can't even describe how horrifying they all were. In fact I'm glad I can't describe it because I don't want to take anyone's innocence away. Mine was cruelly ripped away from me in the form of cute invitations and promises of good food.

I feel sorry for my husband--whoever he may be. In fact I might not even get married because I'm so traumatized. But if I do, we're going to adopt our children and sleep in twin beds. Sorry future husband, but when I think of bridal showers and marriage, this is what happens to my face:

And you don't want a wife who looks like that permanently.